The Missing Ingredient?

There are only two ways proven to create lasting change in our lives. One is through strategic repetition over time, embedding new awareness and aligning our action and the other is through high emotional impact. Clients on my coaching programmed get to experience both!

The first is achieved through our weekly calls where I teach the science of transformation and the tools and strategies to apply it in your life. And the second is achieved through the Vision Workshops and most important, through our Client-only VIP days. The latter are special occasions where clients come together with me as their coach to do a deep dive on strategic or spiritual strategies for creating transformation, build community and celebrate and empower each other’s success and growth.

If you’d love to experience a high emotional impact workshop you’re in luck! The Vision Workshop Virtual is happening on 13 & 14 May 2023 and early bird bookings are available here.

In today’s blog I want to share with you just one snippet of what we covered on our recent VIP Day – it’s one of the missing ingredients that you are likely unaware of and knowing it can catapult your success.

We were focusing on the work of Wallace Wattles, on a short essay at the end of his book The Science of Getting Rich. Neither Wattles nor we focused just on financial riches, welcome and all as they may be for all of us! Rather we were learning tools and strategies to enrich all areas of our lives: our health, our relationships, our careers and professional impact and our experience of time and money freedom. As Wattles said, and I’m paraphrasing here: “whether you want to create a castle or a button, the process is the same”.

The thing I want to share with you today is about how we advance. Most people, most of the time, are waiting for something to happen in their circumstances I order for things to improve. What Wattles shares in no uncertain terms that the outcome we want can never be ours until we are using every thing we already have available to us. We can’t wait for the circumstance to change first:

“This much is certain; to get more, you must make constructive use of what you have. … In fact the degree of rapidity with which you attain what you want will depend upon the perfection with which you use what you have.”

Isn’t that interesting? That in order for me to have a new result, I have to be fully using all that is available to me currently.

So let me unpack that a bit for you.

  • If I’d love a new car, I have to be using the one I have and looking after it and loving it to the best of my ability currently
  • If I want a new job or promotion, I have to be giving the best of me to the job I am in now
  • If I want a new house, I have to be using the one I have to the fullest, keeping it in good order
  • · If I want to meet the love of my life, I have to be showing up in loving ways in the relationships and friendships I have now

And the degree to which I am doing that, the more quickly I can progress.

That’s the missing ingredient for most people – I have to be showing up as my best self now in order to get a bigger result!

Consider your own situation currently in terms of an area of your life where you’d love to make a substantive change. Where is there some room for you to show up more fully?

Let’s take the example of wanting a new job or promotion.

Maybe you’ve been in your current job for a while and feel you’re ready for the next level up? Or maybe you’ve got a new qualification and you think you should move to a different role, department or organization to be able to really use it?

We often get stuck in thinking, when I get the new job or promotion or change department or company, then I’ll perform at that level or use this qualification.

What Wattles is telling us is that we need to be using all our skills and qualifications now, in whatever way we can. Only then will we be given the opportunity to move to a higher order. This is how he graphically and succinctly puts it:

“If you are only jumping half as far as you can, you will never fly.”

So where are you only jumping half as far as you can? Take some time to ponder that this weekend.

Catapult Your Success

In the area where you would love to catapult your success, whether that is in the context of health, love, professional success or time and money freedom, make a list of all the resources you have available to you currently – every asset, skill, experience, talent, education, qualifications, connection… nothing is too big or small.

Notice if you are finding it difficult to think of yourself in terms of having strengths and talent and assets! Most of us have been trained to be humble, to downplay all we have going for us. This is not a time for that – keep going and fill your list as completely as possible!

And then it’s time for a really honest assessment. Are you using all of that skill, knowledge, experience, talent to your fullest ability? Are you fully exploiting all that you have got going for you?

Let’s make this personal and concrete again. How many times have you said “I could write the book on e.g., losing weight/dating/job searching/time management etc.” but you still haven’t achieved the results you’d love?

You know some stuff! You have some experience and skills. The question is not whether you know it but whether you are using what you know.

If you would really love to experience new results are you willing to apply what you know and use all your talents?

And yes, just because you’re applying what you know doesn’t mean it is necessarily easy. But fully utilizing all your knowledge, skill and awareness is what is going to cause you to create the new result.

If you’re putting off playing more full out because it isn’t easy to give it that commitment, then you need to focus not on what you are having to do but on where it is taking you.

  • If having the 10-minute sweaty conversation with a friend, colleague or family member is going to deepen that relationship in way’s you’d love, then it’s worth it.
  • If saying no to sugar is going to give you the sense of health and vitality you crave, then it’s worth it!
  • If stepping up at work at your current grade and salary is going to get you noticed, the opportunity to network or develop the skills that lead to your actual promotion or new job, it’s worth it.
  • If shutting down your computer at 6pm and going home means discomfort in breaking the habit of a lifetime but allows you to have the balance you’d love, then it’s worth it.

And remember, none of this is about making a door mat of yourself. It is just about doing your best with what you have. Don Miguel Ruiz has the last word on this in my opinion.

“…keep doing your best – no more and no less than your best. If you try too hard to do more than your best, you will spend more energy than is needed and, in the end, your best will not be enough. When you overdo, you deplete your body and go against yourself and it will take you longer to accomplish your goal. Bud if you do less than your best, you subject yourself to frustrations, self-judgment, guilt and regrets.”

What commitment are you willing to make to yourself, to show up as your best self more consistently, in the area where you want to create some new results?

Make a decision and do it.

And then let this missing ingredient create some magic in your life:

“Every person who does one thing perfect is instantly presented with an opportunity to begin doing the next larger thing. This is the universal law of all life, and is unfailing.”

If you would love to be in a structure of support whereby you can learn and apply the science of transformation in your life, reach out now and book a complimentary strategy session. Together, we’ll spend some time clarifying the results you’d love and explore how coaching together will empower you to achieve them.

Featured Photo by Alexander Schimmeck on Unsplash